Saturday, August 25, 2007

"If you aren't checking them, you risk losing them"


Called Nuts4ribs, the fundraiser this weekend in Bedford, Nova Scotia features rib cook-offs, music and a nationally acclaimed one-man play by Daniel Schneiderman, titled My Left Nut, a humorous look at a man with testicular cancer.

(I SO want a t-shirt from this event. Think they can send one to NC?)

Facts on Testicular Cancer from the Nuts4Ribs site:

Statistics show that testicular cancer is the most common malignancy in young men between the ages of 18 and 35, and although it accounts for only about one percent of all cancers in men, it is the number one cancer killer among men in their 20s and 30s. Detected early, it is also the most curable form of cancer.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Kasey goes to Craven Cottage


Fulham have signed veteran American goalkeeper Kasey Keller on a free transfer.

The 37-year-old has been available over the summer after leaving Borussia Monchengladbach at the end of last season.

With first choice Antti Niemi currently injured, Fulham boss Lawrie Sanchez felt it was important to bring in a new keeper.

Read the whole story at Sky Sports.

Darn, I was hoping he would go to the MLS so I could maybe see him play in person someday. But Premier League is good too :)

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

I Would Be a Really Lame Homeless Person. Or Thief.


Ok, so this girl ran into the back of my Xterra at a stoplight back at the beginning of July. Nothing major (well, to my vehicle, anyway--hers crumpled up like a used tissue.) I finally got around to having the damage repaired and dropped off the Xterra at the body shop on Monday. Since the insurance company had given me a few extra bucks for a rental, we went to Enterprise where they gave me a tiny little Chevy Aveo (aka "the matchbox car mom is driving.")

All day Monday it was fine. Alas, the Xterra was not ready by Monday night (though the body shop never called me to tell me it wouldn't be), so I kept the Aveo one more day. Tuesday morning I put some gas in it. About ten minutes later, I noticed the check engine light was on. No big deal to me, because my last car, the piece-of-crap Kia Sportage, had a check engine light that was perpetually lit. I looked in the manual just to be sure. "Did you just get fuel?" Why yes, I did. Maybe the gas cap was not put on tight enough. That happens. So anyway I went to work and didn't worry too much about it.

Tuesday afternoon. Pick up soccer player #1, drive home, pick up soccer player #2, drive them to practice in a big fat thunderstorm (which we really, really needed, by the way.) Didn't drive through any huge puddles, lakes, or streams on the way there. The Aveo seems fine. Practice is cancelled (yay!) so we go to get some pizza. Mr. Matchbox Car stalls out in the restaurant parking lot, twice. No big deal still, I think. Maybe something is wet.

One hour later. Fortunately soccer player #1 has been picked up by her dad so we don' t have to take her home. Crank the Aveo. It dies. Crank it again, back up, and it dies. Crank it a third time, roll it across the street to the grocery store parking lot, and it dies. Screw it. I am not driving this tin can anymore.

So I call the Enterprise Road Service number, where they act as if no one's car has ever broken down before. I guess that is their job, but it is sort of amusing. They ask, did I remember to put gas in the car? Yes, as a matter of fact it's full. Did I maybe put diesel in it by mistake? Um, no, I'm not a dumbass.

Enterprise connects me to AAA, who calls a tow truck for me and then tells me I have to wait until it shows up maybe 90 minutes later. And then what? I say. I have no way home. The AAA guy acts surprised and then connects me to another line that just rings about 20 times in a row and then disconnects. Meanwhile I really have to pee so we go in the grocery store where of course they are cleaning the women's room for what seems like thirty minutes. I call my husband and he says he can come pick us up but it will be about a half-hour.

Next, the towing company calls and asks me where I am because AAA has given them the wrong address to the grocery store. They say they will be there in 30 minutes too, not ninety. Okay so far. Except I still have to pee because the teenage boy who is cleaning the bathroom is not familiar with middle-age moms who have marble-sized bladders, and is apparently cleaning the floor with a toothbrush or something.

We see the tow truck coming about fifteen minutes later and I'm not sure what I am supposed to do with all the crap that I have stuffed the car with, so we get a shopping cart and load it up with soccer gear, mailing supplies I had picked up earlier that day, my tote bag, my purse, and some leftover pizza from dinner. The car is taken away and my daughter and I have to sit on a bench in front of the grocery store because, OH! did I mention it was still raining? And that was the only dry place to sit and wait.

Of course we are in one of the higher-end neighborhoods of Chapel Hill, so most of the people coming in and out of the store would look at us, then the shopping cart full of crap, and smile this little sad smile, then look away. If I would have felt safe leaving my daughter outside by herself for a minute, I would have gone into the Harris Teeter and purchased a couple of forties and stuck them right on top of the cart, just to complete the humiliating picture. At that point I think I would have liked to drink one, anyway. Except for the needing to pee part.

So hubby comes along eventually and we unload the cart into his trunk and he says, why don't we go by and see if the Xterra is done? What if it is? I say. Then you can drive it home and come back and pay them for it tomorrow.

Isn't that stealing? I say, and he laughs. It's your car, hon, just call them and tell them you took it. So we went by, and it was there, and it was ready, and I took it. And I felt really guilty.

And then today when I called Enterprise to get the Aveo thing straight, they still wanted to charge me for two days instead of one. And acted like that was some sort of favor they were doing me, because I had somehow mysteriously caused their little tin can to bite the big one. Nu-uh, no ma'am, I am only paying for one day, thanks very much.

PS-The Xterra let me know how much it had missed me by giving off this weird little puff of white smoke and a burnt-plastic smell from under the hood this morning. So it gets to go to the shop AGAIN on Friday.

I wish I lived somewhere where I could ride the bus to work, I truly do.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Finally!

Seems more real now. First scrimmage is tomorrow, you can bet we'll be there!

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

My "Not-Fair" Whine of the Day


You can get a freakin' LOBSTER sub at Subway in Canada now. Made with 100% real lobster, even. Down here in the US of A, I can't even get my all-time favorite fake seafood and pretend crab sub anymore, because they took it off the menu. That is so not fair.

And, PS, hello? what does a Lobster Sub ringtone sound like??

Monday, August 13, 2007

Yippee for Lefties.


Today is Left-Hander's Day.

In honor of this, here is some Left-Handed Trivia:
  • Sinistrophobia is the fear of left-handedness.
  • While many people are left handed, very few are 100% left handed. For example, many left handers golf and bat right handed. On the other hand, there is a high percentage of righties who are 100% right-handed.
  • Tuesdays are Lefties luck day.
  • Only about 10% of the population is left handed.
  • During the 1600's people thought left handers were witches or warlocks (they're not??)
  • International Left Hander's Day was first celebrated on August 13, 1976. It was started by Lefthander's International.
  • They say everyone was born right handed, and only the greatest overcome it. (he,he,he)
  • It is believed that all polar bears are left handed. How anyone figured that out is beyond me.
  • There is a rumor that octopuses (octopi?) have but one right hand. Scientists are diligently studying this issue. Or not.
Some famous left-handers (besides yours truly, of course) can be found here.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Kasey Spotting

From "jmayers" on August 7, 2007:

I was at the Seattle Sounders-Colorado Rapids game tonight. The Sounders beat the living hell out of the MLS club, 5-0 in a U.S. Open Cup quarterfinal.

They will host F.C. Dallas in the semis on September 4th at Qwest Field.

Anyways, long story short, Kasey Keller was here.

So, was there any news on Mr. Keller?

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Homeless World Cup Update

The Homeless World Cup brought 500 homeless people from around the world to Denmark to play soccer. But Copenhagen appears to have been too welcoming -- 15 players have overstayed their visas and gone underground.

Read what happened here.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Things You Should Never Say in a Relationship

(thanks to Swistle, who has a newborn, four more kids besides, and still finds time to blog...I hate you... j/k)
  1. What did you DO all day?
  2. I work all day.
  3. Is that on your diet?
  4. Have you been putting on weight?
  5. Sure, you could stand to lose a few pounds.
  6. Is that what you're wearing?
  7. This isn't rocket science.
  8. I hope we can still be friends.
  9. I love you, I'm just not "in love" with you.
  10. I have a new co-worker--younger than us, but she's already had a highly successful career as a porn star! Smart, too! We talked for hours today about [insert boring work problem here] and she was so interested and had such great ideas!